My Love
I miss my husband so much. He is the rock of our family and life is so weird and hard without him. He sent a box home the other day that just had some miscellaneous stuff in it, and I just cried and held the things that I knew my husband had touched. I haven't seen Shane since August 29th. It just feels unreal. I don't even know if there are words to explain what I feel. This home is so full of Shane. Everywhere I look I see my husband. I sleep on his side of the bed, sit in his spot at the kitchen table, drink from his coffe cup, and wear his shirts. None of this is really what I want. I want to hear Shane come home from work and kiss me like he always did, and then move on to what usually turned into some kind of wrestling match with our kids. I want him to ask me whats for dinner, or if I know where he left his keys. I want him to open my door for me, and hold my hand as we walk somewhere. I want Shane to see our baby girl roll over, and smile that toothless smile, show off her dimples and her eyes that are turning brown. I want my husband to fix the leaky toilet, replace the broken light fixture, and make sure our children are ok . That's what I want. But right now, I get to be strong. Because that is what I need to be. My Lord has given me this strength for now. I will carry on, do my best and uphold our family. Our children will be ok, we will be ok. Why? Because our help comes from the Lord, the Maker of Heaven and earth. He who watches over us will not let our foot slip, He who watches over us will not slumber, The Lord watches over our coming and going. Psalm 121.
I love this picture. I love to see Shane smile. He has great dimples! There are some of the kids' drawings behind him. It's kindof weird to see some of here over there.
Shane isn't exactly having the time of his life. He is out on a project, where he sleeps in a tent and maybe has a luke warm shower. He gets half of Sunday off, where he says all the guys sleep during that time. He will most likely stay there until he comes home. Hopefully sometime in March. (Please Lord!)
March really seems just around the corner. We will hang on until he returns to us.
We love you Shane, and we wait for you, and pray for you every day. We talk about you all the time, and talk about what we are going to do when you get home. Tyler wants to get a dog, but Zack says he can't bacause he's getting a pony and a dog might chase his pony. Jordan talks about how her daddy calls her Baby Girl, and Ryan kisses your pictures and says, "Hi, Da da." Charlee knows who you are. Because her spirit knows her daddy, and because I tell her all about her daddy. I tell her how great you are. How strong, yet how gentle. How you sacrifice so much for others, and how much you love her and can't wait to meet her.
I am so in love with you, Shane. I would wait forever for you.
posted by The Smith Family @ 12:07 AM
6 comments
6 Comments:
Oh Shannon,
Making Love for the world to see.What beauty!
I love you,Kelley
You make me cry Shannon, thank you for sharing so deeply a part of your heart with us. Thank you for sharing that Shane is alright, we love to hear updates since we know nothing other than what you say on your blog. We miss you guys and pray for you often, our kids love to pray for the Smith family and for their daddy who is not with them right now. I just can't even imagine how much you must miss him and he you! So sometime in March? Is that just home on leave or home for good? I know that you don't know for sure but would love to know what you know :) Bless you! We will continue to pray, and please let us know if there is something specific you need or just need prayer for, we want to hold you up as much as we can. I'm proud of you Shannon, you are a wonderful mom and wife!
This country is blessed to have brave men and women like you and Shane. Thank you for your sacrifice. My prayers are with you. Today I looked up the words to the hyme "My hope is built on nothing less" and these two particular verses brought tears to my eyes and strength to my heart. Although my husband is not at war we are in a definate time of trial. And life at times seems very hard.
2. When darkness veils His lovely face,
I rest on His unchanging grace;
In every high and stormy gale
My anchor holds within the veil.
On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.
3. His oath, His covenant, and blood
Support me in the whelming flood;
When every earthly prop gives way,
He then is all my Hope and Stay.
On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.
I pray this brings refreshing to your soul. I love you!
By the way your little flock of five looks so precious in front of the Christmas tree. Charlee looked so sweet in her big sissy's arms. How fun. I can't wait to get there. Hey if I have twins I'll be there before the summer is over.
Dear Shannon, I read your Love Letter once again and was amazed by your "selfish" LOVE, it's the kind of love God truly desires us to have. Its a brides love, a love for her groom pure, willing to keep going no matter what comes her way. You are an awesome Bride blessing your HOUSEBAND and truly doing him good ALL the days of your life.
Kelley
Shannon you are such a beautiful woman.I so can not wait to have you in my arms again.
I couldnot dream of having a more beautiful woman for my wife.
Not to mention you are so sexy.
love your husband
Shannon, I love how your feelings were revealed from deep within your heart. It was like The Song of Solamon part two!
Love,
Your mother-in-law
Jamie
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